I was drinking a glass of wine, my husband came home early, I am busted. What do I do?
I had cancer and the chemo damaged my liver. My doctor told me not to drink alcohol because I needed to save my liver for when I get cancer again. My enzymes levels are fine.
The doctor also told me the kind of cancer I would get is 100% fatal (but not painful). There is currently no cure for it. Maybe in the future.
My marriage sucks. No communication, no sex, no fighting anymore. I am being treated for depression and in therapy but I feel trapped. I cannot leave. I tried.
I think if I want to have a glass of wine once in a while it’s my funeral. I know this sounds like alcoholic logic. Maybe I am one. Maybe I am in danger of becoming one.
My husband hides his drinking which is one drink a day by drinking out of a coffee cup. That doesn’t justify my hiding and by omission lying. I hid it by having a glass in the afternoon or when I go out once a month with my girlfriends. Minimizing, I know.
I have a 14 year old daughter, which is reason enough not to drink or hide my drinking. An 18 year old male picked her up and had her chug tequila. My husband has made it clear that because he caught me drinking a glass of wine, I am now the cause of what happened to her.
So I threw out the wine bottle. I won’t drink alcohol anymore. No big deal. Period. I have gone up to 5 years without any wine or beer when I was pregnant, nursing, undergoing three years of chemo, or happy.
But how do I deal with my husband? He is going to torture me with this. He is going to search my room, car, everywhere. I can barely live with him before this. I feel like running away.
Should I go to my daughter’s soccer game where he is? He has to control his anger in public. But then he gets in a rage when he gets me alone.
Help me.
Tagged with: busted. • came • drinking • Early • glass • Home • husband • wine
Filed under: Alcohol Depression Cures
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Go and meet up w/ your daughter, not him. That’s ridiculous of him to suggest you’re the cause of typical teenage drinking. You deserve a break and I doubt one glass of wine is going to do you in.
Perhaps, some pot would take the edge off.
A glass of wine once in a while is not a big deal. In fact, doctors say it is healthy. Go for it.
Wow…do you ever wonder WHY you lived through the cancer? I don’t think it was to go on and be miserable. Tell you husband his daughter’s drinking is HIS FAULT. He’s a jerk. Of course it’s a bad idea for you to drink, but it’s your life and your body. He seems to think he’s your parent, not your partner. If you have the energy, tell him to keep his issues to himself.
take up smoking.
i hide my beer in the garage. i’m 40 and i estimate i’ve consumed about 15,000 beers so far. it’s the only thing in life i trust anymore. everyone talks about living long, but no one talks about why you should live long.
my grandfathers were both alcoholics and my parents don’t drink. but it’s genetic and i have it. my sister drinks tons of vodka, i stick to beer so i can function.
i would just ignore everything if i was you. have a 1/2 beer once in awhile and let your husband do whatever he wants to.
i don’t have any s*x or communication in my marriage either. i play guitar in the garage and drink beer, hoping my wife will want to hug me again some day.
I am so sorry about your cancer
what i think you should do is find a private and alone time for you and your husband to talk. Tell him how you feel. Explain that it’s not your fault some random guy made your daughter do that. Yes, you should go to the soccer game. The game isn’t about you and your husband but rather about your daughter. She needs you both to cheer her on, because every son or daughter loves to look into the stands and see their parents sitting side by side smiling and proud.
If you can handle not drinking (virgin margaritas might help instead of real ones) Explain to your husband that he should trust you. Marriage is about trust and communication, and you need to tell him that. Both of you need to communicate with each other about your concerns, worries, needs, wants, etc. Your relationship shouldn’t be this way, where you don’t want to see him or talk to him.That’s not what marriage is about.
Clear the air with each other by a private chat. Calm him and explain how you feel and your feelings.
Also, you need to understand that you have people who love you and care for you, like your husband and daughter and relatives, and reading your question, obviously you are not a heavy, out of control drinker. If you continue to drink, it is sending a message to those you love, like ,”I don’t care, I want to drink, and I don’t care that the doctor said not to.” Just give up drinking, it might taste good, but have other drinks instead such as Starbucks lattes, frappachinos, coffee, root beer floats, soda, etc. These will help. Also have virgin drinks and do not go to areas which will tempt you into drinking and pressure you.
I hope I helped and I hope everything goes well with your family. God bless and I will be praying for you.
I think you have to get a talk with your husband about needing support. HE shouldn’t be the police in your family! He should be supporting you, listening to you, and talking about your problems. I think this has caused a lot of added stress to the relationship.
Tell him about this problem!